Content Warning: The following piece discusses issues of sexual assault. If you need help and support, please contact RAINN‘s National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-4673.

The first time it happened, I didn’t tell anybody. At home, I looked at my face in the bathroom mirror. My lips were swollen, as if bee-stung, and my eyes were red, as if all the veins had burst. I’d been choked so hard I almost passed out. I didn’t see it for what it was—sexual assault—until years later, when something similar happened again and I had begun talking, had begun forging meaningful friendships. In talking to friends, I was able to put what happened into context, to understand it. When you make friends, you need to talk. You need to feel okay about talking. 

The first time it happened, I didn’t tell anybody, not only because I didn’t know there was something to tell, but also (crucially), because I didn’t have anybody to tell. “We cannot really risk emotionality in relationships where we do not feel safe,” writes bell hooks in Communion: The Female Search for Love. I had people I could call acquaintances, but didn’t have relationships with them that were deep enough, grounded in intimacy or love enough, to call friendships. Unable to make sense of my own self and life, I was lonely and yearning for connection, and looking for it in all the wrong places—exclusively in romantic relationships.

My erstwhile loneliness and desire for connection were reflected back at me recently with disorientingly intricate detail by Celine Song’s sophomore feature, “Materialists.” A romantic drama about professional matchmaker Lucy (Dakota Johnson), who finds herself needing to make for herself the choices she thrusts upon her clients daily, “Materialists” believes that true love is out there for everybody. This love, though, is uniquely qualified: it is only romantic love. 

In this belief, “Materialists” is much like its spiritual predecessor, “The Worst Person in the World.” At their core, both films believe that the only meaningful union two people can forge is a sexual, romantic one. The films not only discourage friendships, they seem not to believe in them as a viable source of happiness, leaving us with characters—for the most part women—who live atomized, lonely lives, apart from and against other women. 

This is not to say that friendship is completely absent in “Materialists.” (Indeed, it would be unfair to judge a film for something that is entirely out of its purview.) Rather, it is something that, though characters crave it, is denied. “I almost felt like we were friends,” Sophie (Zoe Winters) says to Lucy at one point with disdain. Sophie is one of Lucy’s long-standing clients—nearing her 40s, she feels immense shame about not having found a partner yet, for having hired an “expert” to help her. Lucy sets Sophie up with a man named Mark, who sexually assaults Sophie on their first date. Sophie holds Lucy responsible and feels betrayed and embarrassed. Mistaking the closeness necessitated by the professional relationship between a matchmaker and her client for genuine intimacy and friendship, Sophie is heartbroken by the fact that Lucy would set her up with someone who could hurt her so violently. 

“He was a strong match,” Lucy says helplessly to Sophie during a confrontation. She was just doing her job, in other words. Sophie expresses her sadness, anger, and pain in so many words to Lucy; with sobs hiccupping in her throat, she explains what happened the night of the attack. “I’m a person and I know I deserve love,” she says finally in one of the film’s most affecting scenes. It’s an opening up, a show of vulnerability on her part that Johnson’s Lucy is incapable of returning. Instead, Lucy retorts with silent reiterations of the axioms she has learned on her job. “I know you do, I believe it,” Lucy says, something she says often to her clients: she will believe for them that they deserve love, even if they don’t. Lucy maintains a professional attitude toward Sophie even as the latter melts before her from the heat of her sadness, yearning for closeness and affection. It’s as if a rejection of her plea for a bond, for a human connection.    

The assault is meant to serve as a reality check within the film, as a means by which to express the real danger women come up against every time they go out on a date. Though carried with grace and empathy by Winters, the event mostly reveals the protagonist Lucy’s priorities—it facilitates her professional growth. If anything, it causes Lucy to take pause and consider whether she wants to continue being a matchmaker in a world where people are talked about as though they are commodities. By the end of the film, we learn that she does want to continue, but not before another desperate plea for closeness from Sophie. 

One night, when Lucy is away with John (Chris Evans), her poor theatre-actor ex, she receives a frantic call from Sophie. Mark has shown up outside her apartment and won’t leave. Sophie is terrified and alone and doesn’t know what to do. She has called the police, but they can’t do anything because he hasn’t done anything measurably terrible, not yet. John rushes Lucy to Sophie’s apartment and waits on the stoop outside. When Sophie lets Lucy in, she is obviously exhausted and laughs nervously as if to let out the fear that has been trapped within her all night. Lucy talks to Sophie steadily, telling her that there is legal action she can take. Sophie nods, her eyes glassy. And when Lucy asks her if she would like a hug, it’s as if all remaining energy leaves Sophie; she collapses into the embrace and weeps. 

“You know what I’ve been thinking about?” Sophie says after a while. “I really need to get a boyfriend so I have someone to call that’s not my fucking matchmaker.” She jokes about dying alone, smiling a sad smile. “I promise you you’re going to marry the love of your life,” Lucy says before going on to reiterate, “You don’t have to believe it. I believe it.” Sophie says she’s not asking for a miracle, she just wants someone “who can’t help but love me back.” Lucy stays with Sophie for the duration of the night, leaving for a moment when the sun comes up to tell John, still on the stoop, that she will help Sophie file a restraining order. We never see Sophie again.

It’s an incredibly disappointing scene, an interaction between two women that Song absolutely bungles. Palpable in Winters’ Sophie is an intense desire for reciprocal love and tenderness, but Song never manages to realize or offer that what Sophie is looking for can be found in friendship. It’s as if Song senses through Sophie that friendship can soothe—through the character’s belief that she and Lucy are friends, through her turning to Lucy in a moment of crisis—but the writer/director falls short of seeing friendship as a relationship worthwhile in itself. 

It’s heartbreaking that Sophie repeatedly feels the need to apologize for or take back her feelings of friendship toward Lucy. It’s heartbreaking to hear her say that she should get a boyfriend so she wouldn’t have to turn to Lucy with her pain. The film doesn’t seem to realize that Sophie is turning to Lucy for things people often turn to their friends for. That Sophie misreads her relationship with Lucy initially is totally understandable, because she has put in emotional work in laying herself bare to Lucy; she, as hooks says, has come to feel safe with the woman. We want our friends to see us, to understand us, to comfort us when we need it. Lucy functions as a friend in Sophie’s mind, and the film’s ultimate tragedy is that it does not have Lucy, in turn, see Sophie as a friend; rather, it has her turn away or maintain a professional distance from the other woman. This scene, Sophie’s final scene, doesn’t end with Lucy comforting Sophie as a friend, but as a client, evident in Lucy’s reiteration of her axiom, in a return to terms of her trade. 

It is evident that Song has Sophie turn to Lucy in order that she may learn persistence. It is not because she wants the two characters to become friends, least of all because she wants to telegraph how friendship can allow healing after the kind of trauma Sophie has experienced. This refusal to privilege friendship is evident in what the two women end up discussing: boyfriends. Song doesn’t even seem to want to consider how lonely dating in the modern age has left us; she doesn’t say much about loneliness at all, even as she depicts deeply lonely characters. Rather, she seems to want to make the underwhelming point that we should not give up in our search for romantic love, because it will find us.

In the film’s final moments, Lucy is on the phone with her boss, who tells her that Sophie has hit it off with her latest date. It is suggested that the woman, who has seemed so incredibly lonely throughout the film, has finally found a boyfriend she can call. It’s not suggested that Lucy will talk to or has talked to Sophie again in any capacity other than as a client. The women remain separated by a wall of professionalism, with any friendship they might have had left unnurtured. They don’t talk to each other immediately, Sophie is rather talked about, because they don’t need to anymore, because Lucy’s work is done. The women have found their men and no longer have any use for each other.

In “Materialists”’ world, friendship feels like a mistake; it is something apologized for, or something that is only momentary, a placeholder until a romantic partner is found. No matter that couples break up all the time, Sophie could easily, later on, become as alone and without a person to call as she is during the film. What is important is that she has found a romantic partner, has achieved the goal toward which Sophie’s and Lucy’s energies have been focused. Any friendship that blooms is accidental and left to fizzle. Lucy is just as alone as Sophie, but while the latter craves friendship, Lucy seems to genuinely not want it: at home, she sits alone, and when something terrible happens to her in her career, she calls a man she’s seeing in a romantic capacity. In the way that the opening scene depicts a cave woman moving out and away from her mother and younger sister and toward a man, this film moves away from community and toward heterosexual love.  

Joachim Trier’s critically acclaimed and apparently universally beloved film “The Worst Person in the World,” too, is a film that doesn’t seem to feel that community and friendship are worthwhile pursuits in life. In line with Song’s compartmentalization in “Materialists”—which seems stylistically indebted to Trier’s film—here a person is and can be either alone or in a romantic partnership. The film focuses on four years in Julie’s (Renate Reinsve) life as she tries to figure out who she is, with the four years depicted solely on her romantic and professional pursuits. 

While in “Materialists,” friendship is considered to be deprioritized and then overcome, in “Worst Person,” friendship is impossible. I understand that the film follows a woman who feels inadequate, who feels that she is failing at living a good life; nonetheless, it doesn’t feel part of Julie’s terribleness, or her “worst”-ness, in how she considers other women. Julie is solitary from the moment the film begins. As she moves from one discipline of study to another, she embarks on numerous romantic relationships, but no lasting friendships. “She observed her fellow students,” the narrator says at the film’s beginning as Julie looks over her shoulder at a group of female students talking to each other, being friendly with each other. Julie is sitting markedly apart from them. “Norway’s future spiritual advisors,” the narrator says, intercepting Julie’s thoughts. “Mostly girls with borderline eating disorders.” The next instant, she has an affair with her professor. 

It’s completely unwarranted what is said about the other girls having an eating disorder. Notwithstanding the fact that they have the exact same build as Julie herself, it doesn’t feel as though this is a comment about women’s body images and pressures to conform, so sharply and tersely lodged into the moment as it is. It just feels cruel. It’s as if to say, Julie doesn’t concern herself with her self-image like these other girls, she’s not like them, she’s too busy having sex with her instructor. From the film’s first beats, other women are defined as decidedly apart from Julie; they’re a group with uniform concerns while Julie thinks against the grain, and is troubled by more meaningful problems. Other women aren’t there to be friends with, but there to define oneself against.  

Women other than Julie hardly have a voice in this film, are never shown in a positive light, and are never seen to be living happy lives worthy of being entered into or being curious about. Instead, they live lives a modern woman ought to avoid replicating or fraternizing with. A few moments later in the film, Julie goes on a trip with her current boyfriend Aksel (Anders Danielsen Lie) to his parents’ home, hosted by his sister, her husband, and their kids. Julie feels that Aksel’s sister doesn’t like her, and Aksel tells her that she’s just shy. “That’s what you say about boring people,” Julie retorts. Later in the evening, one of the kids throws a tantrum at bedtime, and her mother chases her around the lawn as the girl screams. 

“Don’t make a scene,” the mother pleads with her child, tripping over herself as she tries to get hold of her daughter. Everybody, including the child’s father, just watches them; nobody helps the mother put the kids to bed. A scene is made, and the mother emerges from it looking like the loser. “Kids can be intense,” Aksel says with chagrin, and that seems to be the moment’s message. Not that mothers bear the burden of disciplining their children, nor that the father didn’t do anything to help his wife put his own kid to bed. Just that kids are intense. The lesson Julie gleans about herself from the scene is that she does not want kids; she and Aksel have a fight about this that night. 

It’s bitterly ironic that the next night, over dinner, Julie makes a feminist observation. Society knows everything about men’s problems, she says, but people are too shy to talk about period blood. What angers me about this scene is that Julie doesn’t look to the other women at the table for confirmation of her observation, which is certainly correct; she doesn’t look to them for camaraderie or recognition, and she doesn’t make eye contact with them at all. She only looks to Aksel and his brother-in-law, as if considering only these men as worthy of conversation. “If men had periods, that’s all we’d hear about,” she says before going on to make a point about mansplaining. 

Later yet in the night, they’re all dancing, and Julie tries to get the woman who, the previous day, made a scene with her daughter to dance, but it ends terribly when she hits her head on a lamp and injures herself. The night ends with Julie and Aksel overhearing that same woman fighting with her husband. “Shall we make a baby?” Julie whispers to Aksel with a sly smile. It’s meant to be a knowing jab at the idea that many couples commit to fighting after they have kids, but it feels mean in the way that the earlier remark about eating disorders feels mean. The woman who gets injured has spent what is meant to be a holiday working, taking care of her children, and she’s been hurt when all she wanted was to have fun; instead of making an effort to understand her, to allow her to express her frustration, the film mocks her through Julie.

This woman, with her children and her traditional concerns, tries to enter into dialogue with Julie, but Julie moves away from her. When she asks Julie if she has any friends with kids, Julie says only one, though we never meet them. Julie sees this woman, tired, hurt, and angry, and strives to avoid a fate like hers; it’s a life she can never want nor associate with. For Julie, people with children aren’t meant to be friends with at all; all she’s seen them do is fight and care for kids. Accordingly, she runs away from her long-term relationship. Single women, too, aren’t meant to be friends with; they have eating disorders. The only kind of relationship valued in Julie’s life, as we see it, is a romantic one, and when that becomes an untenable option, she chooses to be alone.   

The film’s final moments depict Julie in her small apartment, working on editing her photographs. The lesson Julie has learned is that she needs to choose herself, to work on herself, if she wants to be happy. The film ends with Julie having found self-esteem, and rightfully so. “Given our early obsessions with seducing and pleasing others to affirm our worth, we lose ourselves in the search to be accepted, included, desired,” hooks writes in Communion. And so at film’s end, Julie discovers herself, but this self-discovery is only conceived of in a professional sense, and comes at the cost of isolation. Julie does not forge community, does not make new friends. According to hooks, the feminist movement “told us that we were better off if we stopped thinking about love, if we could live our lives as though love did not matter, because if we did not do so we were in the danger of becoming a member of a truly despised female category: ‘the woman who loves too much.’”

Julie becomes a good woman according to patriarchal understanding: self-sufficient and self-reliant, she is not a burden on anyone; her desires snuffed, she is focused on making money. While she loved men earlier, by the film’s end, she has gotten it out of her system. She becomes a girlboss, a productive member of society, atomized like Aksel, a traditionally masculine man. Meanwhile, femininity (and all that it carries with it ideologically, things like friendship and community and messy desires) is meant to be absolutely avoided and unwanted; it is the bad life. It’s always haunted me how this film ends, so confined and clean, without desire, without love.     

On the face of it, these films centre a woman’s desires and feelings and internal landscapes. They seem progressive. But the lives they have their women live are endlessly lonely and individualistic, capitalistic in how they leave their protagonists as an atomized unit apart from a lively community. These films don’t seem to consider love as possible within community, in platonic settings, in friendships; it’s as if they are discouraging collectivization, and leaving unchallenged the current systems of oppression. As hooks writes, “female allegiance to males upholds heterosexism,” and in their focus on heterosexual romantic pairings as the only or most important site of socialization, as the sole bond worthy of effort or care or attention, these films implicitly uphold patriarchy. 

This is not to say that romantic comedies or romantic dramas are ill-equipped to depict platonic love alongside romantic love, because it absolutely is possible to hold space for both. As “Materialists” and “Worst Person” seem to run away from female friendship and platonic love, Gillian Robespierre’s “Obvious Child” celebrates and honours friendship in the same breath as it depicts a striving for romantic love. The film follows Jenny Slate’s Donna as she deals with the aftermath of a one-night stand and decides to get an abortion, and also nurtures a sweet relationship after the fact with her one-night stand, Max (Jake Lacy). And as it reckons with the idea of abortion without also glamorizing it or sensationalizing it, the film also allows Donna a little community where she can access healing and care.

Donna has friends: Nellie (Gaby Hoffmann) and Joey (Gabe Liedman). And they come together to just hang out, to talk over what Donna has experienced, to gossip, to make jokes, and to share confessions, advice, happinesses, and sadnesses. “Does having an abortion hurt?” Donna asks Nellie one night when the three of them are getting wine drunk. It’s a candid and free question, asked easily and answered easily. Donna is nervous. It doesn’t hurt, Nellie says, but there are cramps afterwards. The procedure only takes a few minutes, and it isn’t scary. 

“How often do you think about it?” Donna asks Nellie. “I think about it sometimes,” Nellie says. “Once in a while. And then I get really sad for my little teenage self.” But she never regrets it. It’s the kind of conversation friend groups have all the time, but it’s depicted in the movie with such ease and calmness, such inevitability and warmth, which is absolutely stunning. Of course, Donna talks to her friends about her feelings, and of cours,e Nellie shares her experience with Donna in an effort to make her feel less alone. It’s the kind of sharing of information that women have been partaking of for ages, the kind that saves lives, literally and figuratively, and it’s rooted in the safety that hooks talks about, that Sophie craves.   

And so even as the film ends on Donna and Max coming together in a romantic union, we know that Donna still has Nellie and Joey. They are, the three of them, still there for each other; they can still stay up all night drinking wine and sharing experiences and being silly, all the while holding each other, all the while loving each other in the way that only best friends can.  

I have been as lonely and starved of connection as Sophie, and like Julie, like any other girl coming of age under patriarchy, I have thought less of other women and of myself as special in an effort to gain patriarchy’s approval. But survival, happiness itself, isn’t dependent on eradicating desires for certain kinds of love, on privileging one thing over another—this is the kind of competitive thinking fostered by capitalism. 

My friendships have saved my life again and again. Making friends allows us to make sense of the world and ourselves, to grow. “Commitment is the ground of our being that lets us make mistakes, be forgiven, and try again,” hooks writes. Such a commitment would have allowed Sophie to feel less guilty about calling Lucy, and might have allowed Julie’s life to still contain love. My friends allow me to move into the world with confidence, and I, like Donna, know that I can return to them at any time and in any state, and they will embrace me. They will show me love when nobody else can. Because of my friends, I don’t have to be the only one carrying the knowledge of my life anymore; I can share pain, stories, and fun. Because of my friends, I don’t have to look at myself alone in the mirror. I can see myself reflected in their gaze, and they reflected in mine.

In 2024, I saw over 100 new releases, and if you’re asking yourself “why the f*ck would he try to rank all of those films”, well, I am too. It’s a daunting and honestly kind of arbitrary task, but damn, do I love myself a list. So here is a very loose ranking of every new release I saw in 2024. Most of these are 2024; there are some that are technically 2023 releases, but didn’t see a wide release in America until this year, so I’m gonna go ahead and count those. I’ve also included my top 20 video and my bottom 10 video if you’d like to cut to the chase and see what I thought was the best of the best (and the worst of the worst).

#104 – #80

#79 – #60

#59 – #40

#39 – #20

#19 – #11

#10 – #1

#104. Imaginary

Blumhouse has been peddling some true stinkers for a while now. Occassionally you get one that’s a little fun like M3gan, but more often than not you’re getting unoriginal, unscary, cheaply made nothings designed to make a cheap buck. Imaginary isn’t the only film of its ilk on this list, but it’s definitely the worst of the bunch that I’ve seen. It’s another haunted doll movie from the haunted doll factory that manages to be predictable, lazy, and worst of all, unimaginative. Every character in this is insufferable and a headache to follow, while the scares are your typical “thing comes around the corner really fast” set to loud music. There’s hardly any tension or suspense in the pacing or the editing, coming off as just a worse version of Insidious; a haunted house film that eventually leads to a journey into the ghost dimension thanks to Old Lady Exposition. The set design of Imagination Land or whatever the f*ck it’s called is probably the best part of the film, but it comes too little too late. The only thing this had me imagining was a better movie.

RATING: 1/5

#103. Madame Web

A genuine achievement, and I’m being totally serious. Not often does a studio continue to one-up itself with each following fumble, but Sony isn’t just any old studio. They’re the home of “We own the rights? Then let’s make the movie!”, no matter how miniscule or unimportant the character is. From conception to the credits, this film is a pile of confoundment that truly must be seen to be believed. Next to nothing about this film works; its cast is wooden and misused, the technicals are laughably shoddy, the writing isn’t a first draft, it’s a first thought. It all ends up boiling down to a film that is actually genuinely entertaining at times. I can’t remember the last time a big studio put out something almost so bad it’s good unironically (they thought they had it with Morbius and paid the price upon re-release). Everything from the cringey line deliveries to the poorly conceived motivations to a character having what seems like all of his lines done poorly in post, Madame Web is truly something else. Truthfully, it didn’t fill me with the disdain that some of the other films on this list gave me, and that’s why it doesn’t take the number one spot.

RATING: 1/5

FULL REVIEW

#102. Red One

You know, I usually scoff at people that make a big fuss about the overly commercialized nature of Christmas overtaking the more important emotions of the season, but with a film like this, I can definitely feel where they’re coming from. Straight off the “safe and market tested” assembly line, Red One is shockingly void of anything remotely resembling holiday cheer other than the fact it happens to feature Santa Claus, snowmen and Krampus. Mostly feeling like a vanity project for star Dwayne Johnson, the film features stale action, drab visuals, and phoned in performances, with the only real admirable element being the film’s sparse but appreciated prosthetic work. It doesn’t matter how much glitter and ribbons you put on it; a lump of coal is still a lump of coal.

RATING: 1.5/5

FULL REVIEW

#101. Lift

An utterly sauceless vanity vehicle trying to convince us Kevin Hart can play the cool, suave anti-hero with a heart of gold. It checks all the boxes of your generic heist movies, yet performs with the kind of misplaced sincerety that makes you believe they thought they were making something incredible. Hart is unfortunately unfunny due to the script’s shortcomings as well as the design of the character not being able to lend itself to his strengths as a comedian. It’s cliche as hell, from motion graphics letting us know who THE HACKER of the team is to recycled genre lines like “Are you still mad about that job in *foreign city*. The first five minutes featured an egregious ADR blunder and an NFT heist, which is enough of a warning to just turn it off right then and there.

RATING: 1.5/5

#100. Jackpot!

Has to be the most annoying film I saw this year. The terrible comedy just never stops, never giving you a repreave, waterboarding you with the most bland, unfunny situational comedy. John Cena, the golden goose that he is, can’t even salvage the shit he’s fed with his comedic timing. The fun, Purge-like concept is drowned underneath a toothless use of an R-rating and a directing style that just isn’t up to snuff with the madness it’s trying to capture. This almost became a DNF because of the huge headache it brought on, but I stuck it out for you. Don’t make the same mistake I did.

RATING: 1.5/5

#99. Unfrosted

The movie WOKE HOLLYWOOD doesn’t want you to see! Tongue and cheek and obviously yearning for the days when silly comedies like these were on top, yet this commits the cardinal sin that set’s it a part from other films of its ilk: it’s not funny. Good for one or two laughs but it’s an incredibly phoned in celebrity hangout caught on camera kind of film. Cameos pop in to deliver some of the most underbaked jokes and puns imaginable, with the main cast being just as bad if not worse. Senfield can’t act, we know this, but his inability to even sell the silliness of the film while in character makes it look like he doesn’t even have the heart for this project, AND HE DIRECTED IT! I liked the implication JFK was assassinated by milk men though. A minor bright spot, and I can only wonder how much funnier this could have been if someone who actually managed to evolve their comedy with the times had directed this.

RATING: 1.5/5

#98. Night Swim

Oh boy, another Blumhouse stinker. Night Swim shows droplets of promise with its premise, but unfortunately it can’t muster up enough creativity to turn it into anything worthwhile. The actors are fed embarrassing lines and story beats that severely underutilizes their talents (Kerry Condon, what are you doing here?), while the story itself can’t find ways to scare you outside of the most obvious jump scares that can be found literally everywhere else. This slice of summertime horror’s only saving grace was that it’s relatively short and was made for next to nothing, so it can continue to fuel the content factory that is Blumhouse. I appreciate Blumhouse giving opportunities to first-time directors, but can we start making movies that aren’t just easy cash grabs that require minimal effort? Just skip this one. You’ll find more enjoyment jumping headfirst into the shallow end.

RATING: 1.5/5

FULL REVIEW

#97. This is Me…Now

LOL. LMAO, even. If you want a taste of grade-A celebrity delusion, look no further than this mini-musical from Jennifer Lopez. A fantastical semi-autobiography that details Lopez’s journey to find love again, while also learning to love herself! I’ll give credit where credit is due, a lot of the musical numbers are genuinely visually impressive, despite some laughable choreography at times. It’s the narrative web that combines these moments together that’s the real problem. Though it may try to convince you to be an earnest self reflection, this does nothing to convince me that Lopez’s journey of love and loss has made her change in any kind of meaningful way. How Affleck listened to the pitch of this and agreed to go along with it (only to seemingly break-up later this year) is beyond me. Mercifully it’s barely an hour, and the ridiculousness does provide a good few laughs. It isn’t the only Lopez misstep at the movies this year, but it’s certainly the weakest.

RATING: 1.5/5

#96. Trigger Warning

It isn’t the cringey piece of social commentary a title like that may have you believe, but what it is is an incredibly forgettable action thriller; Netflix’s bread and butter! There are some blips of creativety, mostly in how some of the fight scenes are choreographed, but it doesn’t help that everything built around it is cliche and uninteresting. The pieces are there; a badass veteran returning to her home town and getting caught up in a conspiracy that involves more people than she thinks, and Jessica Alba is showing a side of her I quite enjoy, but could they really not have spared any kind of personality? Not egregious, but unjustifiably a time waster.

RATING: 1.5/5

#95. Rebel Moon – Part 2: The Scargiver

Yet another display of director Zack Snyder’s worst habits; characters lacking true maturity to be taken seriously, dialogue that says little despite a lot being spoken, and hacked-to-bits action sequences that suffer from either poorly designed setups or an atrocious overreliance on slow motion. This “mature” Star Wars riff only earns that title through heightened violence and more depressing character moments, but neither of these carry enough emotional weight to truly matter by the end. Just watch Andor instead.

RATING: 1.5/5

FULL REVIEW

#94. Venom: The Last Dance

As a lifelong fan of the character, I feel I should be more disappointed in Sony’s handling of a Venom trilogy, but truthfully, I’m just numb to it. While the previous two films has their flaws, I wouldn’t exactly call them “boring”. Yet this third installment takes the misguided efforts of the first three films and injects them into a painfully uninteresting plot that does next to nothing to build upon the relationship of our two main characters while trying to pass this off as a sappy send-off. Despite setting itself up to be far more goofy, the film never really capitalizes on the absurdity, instead settling on generic story beats and sequences that don’t come together to form the satisfying send-off you would expect. I would highly advise refraining from a last dance if you barely have any legs to stand on in the first place.

RATING: 1.5/5

FULL REVIEW

#93. Atlas

I’ll give this credit, it’s not the worst thing Jennifer Lopez has found herself in this year, but it certainly isn’t good either. An incredibly generic plot is bolstered to a by-the-numbers human/AI relationship that does the bare minimum in exploring our relationship to technology. The performances aren’t terrible, though their direction certainly falls short, which can also be said about the film’s lackluster world building and lead threat. It screams “Netflix original” until it’s blue in the face, and by the time I was done with Atlus, all I could do was shrug.

RATING: 2/5

#92. Argylle

The “twisted” mind of Matthew Vaughn may need to be examined by professionals, because his gaudy action films are starting to get out of hand. While the story is admittedly interesting, the execution fell flat for me because of its visual style and its writing. The film really tries to convince you that you’re watching something fun and exciting, but like many of its sequences and settings, it feels very artificial. For all its silliness and bright colors, I found it to be lacking even the smallest, most passable amount of depth and humor needed to get me to invest myself in this. Over-gorging itself on visual flair to the point of sickness and regulating it’s talented cast to half-baked comedy, the only mystery here is how it all came to be such a mess.

RATING: 2/5

FULL REVIEW

#91. Sweet Dreams

While the intentions may have been sincere, this blend of non-actors and therapy-speak just didn’t hit for me on an emotional or comedic level. I won’t fault Knoxville for trying something more dramatic, but it ended up feeling woefully impersonal despite it’s heavier themes of addiction and recovery. It just can’t figure out a way to tell you it’s themes and emotions without directly beating you over the head with them. Character personalities are inconsistent, and while their comradery is occasionally enjoyable, the dialogue ranges from hit or miss riffs to flatly delivered exposition to insincere, textbook regurgitations on the struggles of recovery. Knoxville doesn’t get hit in the dick once, and I’m surprised that’s what I’m missing.

RATING: 2/5

#90. The Beekeeper

John Wick with bees. Sounds just dumb enough to be enjoyable, but that isn’t really the case here. It’s good for the usual Statham beat-em-up, but there’s not really much more to it’s identity or style. It really just feel regurgitative of other films of its ilk, failing to bring anything all the unique to the table. The action and presentation is just servicable, but there’s a severe amount of lulls inbetween scenes trying to expand the film’s world and the lore of the titular keeper of bees. A decent but forgettable time, and don’t worry, he never says anything like “You’ve just been pollonated”. But now I almost kind of want that movie?

RATING: 2/5

FULL REVIEW

#89. The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare

This felt like yet another retread for Ritchie, and while it’s slightly more interesting than last year’s Operation Fortune, it left me with about the same feeling. Ritchie really seems to dig these big team-up movies, yet hasn’t seemed to completely crack the code on how to structure them in unique ways. It’s a shame, because the charasmatic cast are having a delightful time mowing down Germans with their silly little accents. Yet, the characters they inhabit aren’t all that memorable and posses the depth of a puddle of water. The action can tide you over at times, but I found it disappointingly sparse, which wouldn’t be much of an issue if the surrounding story managed to at least be enticing. Buried inside here is an attractive story of espionage, power dynamics, and being too cool for costume parties, but it’s thrown to the wayside in favor of more “we’re essembling a team” nonsense.

RATING: 2/5

#88. Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire

This managed to be a halfway enjoyable time that unfortunately never really convinced me on the grounds of its existence. Lacking in the humor and scrappiness of the original films while also missing the somewhat endearing heart of its predecessor, Frozen Empire ends up doing its best MCU impression, with flat characters, lame dialogue, and an ice cold grip on the past it’s too afraid to move on from. The film never really nails that juggle of old and new characters, as previous characters from the prior film are put in the backseat while legacy characters with nothing more to build upon trudge along for one last hoorah. It’s not a complete visual eyesore at the least, but it’s apparently clear the intention here was to build up a franchise rather than deliver a memorable story.

RATING: 2/5

FULL REVIEW

#87. V/H/S/Beyond

The V/H/S franchise has always been a mixed bag, but I think most fans will tell you the same. This latest batch of shorts, this time focusing around sci-fi horror, is unfortunately more misses than hits. I hate to be a stickler, but some of these shorts just do not work well with the “found footage” structure, leading to shoehorned reasons for cameras to be rolling and leaps in logic to make sure you catch everything on camera. Yet, there are some winners, like Justin Long‘s “Furbabies” and Kate Siegel’s “Stowaway” that exist on very different spectrums yet make great use of the time and premise. Everything else can feel quite cheap and rough, even for a series that has thrived with low budgets. It’s good for a few moments of fun, but the series has better offerings elsewhere.

RATING: 2/5

#86. The Duel

This felt like something me and my friends would have made in college given a few thousand dollars, and I don’t really mean that in a good way. A half decent premise is overstuffed with the kind of faux-Coen Brothers/Tarantino “life is so deep, bro” dialogue that every film kid thinks is the most insightful and creative thing they’ve ever heard. My writing was like that at one point too so I can say that. It attempts to give the film the impression that it’s grander or more thought provoking than it actually is, but at the end of the day it’s more cringeworthy than anything. This also dampens the performances, who spout the kind of trite monologues and deliveries that have been repeated in every theater class across the country. It looks competent in its editing and lighting, but it did little to hook me outside of those elements.

RATING: 2/5

#85. Damsel

The middle chunk of this film is actually pretty solid; a fantasy survival film that actually felt fairly brutal at time for a PG-13 film. Millie does a pretty decent job selling the struggles, and some of the set design is actually pretty nice to look at. When the film shows of its more sweeping and large locations is when the film begins to look noticeably cheap, with a lot of these areas feeling too much like a soundstage due to uneven lighting and no real sense of presence. It just so happens that the film’s weakest narrative points also happen to take place in these locations as well. The beginning and end are fairly predictable teen fantasy but I do think there’s something worth seeing in between it all.

RATING: 2.5/5

#84. Spaceman

Project Hail Mary if it was more or less a snorefest. There’s some interesting visuals and introspection on the human desire for interaction, but it’s all presented through snails pace story and a sleepwalking Adam Sandler. I get why his character would be like this, given his isolation and relationship with his wife, but he’s not interesting or challenged enough to make me care about his journey to black holes and whatnot. It’s fine, but definitely not worth a rewatch. The Project Hail Mary movie can’t come soon enough.

RATING: 2.5/5

#83. Bob Marley: One Love

Exactly what you expect it to be; an unchallenging, straightforward look at a music icon and his journey through the world. The lead performance luckily doesn’t come off as a parody, and it was nice that the film didn’t try to de-Jamaicanize the people and the culture to be more approachable for Western audiences. Of course the music is fun, but you still get those scenes where Bob comes up with the most iconic string of words ever conceived either on the fly or right after he sees his inspiration. A passable and easy watch to give you more insight on the icon, just maybe not as much on the man behind it.

RATING: 2.5/

#82. I.S.S.

If Mark Wahlberg was there, things would have gone down a lot differently (no survivors).

A mostly successful paranoia thriller set in space that tests are alliances to man and nation, yet it kind of just meanders about while riding off of just enough tension to not put you to sleep. The visuals at least look great and the performances are all pretty solid, but this is still one of the most January-ass January releases. Not great, but not terrible.

RATING: 2.5/5

#81. Beverly Hills Cop: Axel F

A perfectly servicable legacy sequel that knows exactly what it is and doesn’t try to detour out of that area in the slightest. Murphy is of course the best part, even if it’s painfully obvious his heart isn’t as in this as before. The action is fine, but the comedy is missing that edge and fluidity that you just don’t find in movies much anymore. But this film took the oppurtunity to dunk of Jupiter Ascending, so it’s okay in my book.

RATING: 2.5

#80. The American Society of Magical Negroes

Despite a pretty significant satirical goal, this film ended up feeling all over the place in what it wanted its message to be. Sociatal issues like race definitiley require depth and an unflinching earnestness to look deeper into yourself and others, but this film doesn’t break much ground outside the surface. Think Sorry to Bother You if it was less edgy, less absurd, and less stylish. It offers caricatures but lacks the teeth to really sink into to sociopolitical issues the film wants to joke about. Luckily I found it to be mostly funny and I’ll watch anything with Justice Smith, but something like this deserves a lot more poignancy than what it got.

RATING: 2.5/5

#79. Rooster

The Lighthouse if it was set in the Australian bush, and I wish that it was as interesting as that sounds. It’s insanely dreary with all the calling cards of a “men being depressed men” art house flick; possibly dead wife/daughter that you only see in naked dream sequences, drinking your problems away, and getting naked with the homies. For all its symbolism and reflections I didn’t really find it to say anything all that worthwhile, though the offbeat relationship between the two leads does lead to some occassional endearment and laughs, largely due in part to Hugo Weaving’s performance. Not pointless, but not exactly thought provoking either.

RATING: 2.5/5

#78. In a Violent Nature

With all the elevated horror movies floating around out there nowadays, the slasher genre was probably overdue for an “elevation”. Following a film like that through the eyes of a silent, masked killer does sound interesting, until you realize that a lot of his time is just spent walking through the woods. I just didn’t really think this opened the door for any new introspection on this kind of character or genre. These characters are usually blank slates that are just the to represent a looming fear that may be representation of a deeper issue or emotion. Putting all the focus on the killer removes some of that mystique and doesn’t really serve a greater purpose in my eyes. Yet, the kills are aptly brutal, and I actually really liked the ending of this. It’s not what you might expect, but I love the implication of what it presents, it’s just too bad implication is completely thrown out the window for the majority of the film.

RATING: 2.5/5

#77. Cuckoo

This felt like an instance where the intelligence(?) of the script got lost in production. There’s certainly something under the surface that could give this film meaning, but it never materializes. There are solid moments of paranoia and anxiety, but it builds towards nothing of note other than a rapid fire of ideas that don’t add up to much. Schaffer does a solid job despite weak characterization, which is a shame considering the film did so much to make me root against her throughout. It left me with questions I know a 2nd viewing wouldn’t give me, and I can’t really be damned to do a deep dive into what was intended. While I can’t say I hated it, this severely disappointed me.

RATING: 2.5/5

#76. Emilia Perez

This film has been getting a ton of award buzz, and after watching it, I can only real assume that’s because of its face rather than its contents. A musical about a Mexican cartel kingpin finding a new life as a trans woman? It’s certainly an attention grabber, but once it reeled me in, it did little to keep me there. For a musical, I didn’t find nearly any of the numbers to be entertaining or all that memorable, while smaller moments of brief singing felt as though they were thrown in because on the day they remembered they were making a musical. With a narrative focusing around a trans woman, I thought it did very little to explore the actual trans experience at a time where it’s potentiall never been more important. Zoe Saldana, Karla Sofia Gascon and Selena Gomez all do admirable jobs with what they’re given, but I thought some of the characterizations fell a little flat. Saldana‘s character hardly has any kind of arc, yet she’s more or less treated as the main character (not the title character). Her inclusion could have been removed or lessened to put the real focus on Emilia, giving more room for exploration into its out-there premise. That being said, it does look pretty great visually and performances are all solid across the board, so I can’t say I hated this, but the critical response to this has really made me question a base I usually find myself agreeing with.

RATING: 2.5/5

#75. Badland Hunters

A fairly servicable post-apocolyptic film that has some interesting ideas under its belt, though the exectution is more or less par for the course. I thought the world building was pretty interesting and I appreciated the spin it put on tried elements like zombies. And of course, Ma Dong-seok. Do you really need more than that? Well, I would have liked it to be a bit more refined and consistent, but this is still a decent watch regardless.

RATING: 2.5/5

#74. Miller’s Girl

It constantly teeters between biting commentary and straight up fanfiction. The setup of a teenager trying to seduce her teenager is definitely a controversial one, but I wish it did something edgier yet insightful rather than a pretty surface level and hollow take on this familiar setup. Power dynamics weren’t as toyed with as I was hoping, but the lead performances and most of the script did make this fairly watchable.

RATING: 2.5/5

#73. Parallel

A pretty simple but interesting low-budget sci-fi premise, with pretty okay performances despite a fairly weak script that doesn’t take full advantage of the idea or really ties it into the themes it presents. This also leads to a pretty flat ending that kind of felt like a cop out. For what it’s worth, it’s shot shot pretty nicely, but overall, it doesn’t feel like it reaches its full potential.

RATING: 2.5/5

#72. Ricky Stanicky

Simple, juvenile, and incredibly predictable in both its narrative and comedy. But…why did I laugh so much? John Cena is the show stealer in his failing upward titular role, while everyone else around him is kind of just fine. The story can be pretty fun at times if not a bit repetitive. It’s certainly better than expected, but I doubt I’ll ever go out of my way to watch it again.

RATING: 2.5/5

#71. Mean Girls

A film that was so afraid to market itself as a musical, and I kinda see why. The jump from stage to screen was not incredibly seamless, with a lot of the songs falling flat. Also, these girls weren’t even all that mean? It really felt like the edge of the original was sanded off, but don’t they know that being a huge asshole is just as contemporary as ever? The film’s story and songs do pick up more in the latter half of the movie, with Renee Rapp and Avantika being the standouts for me. Nothing beats the original though, and unless you were a fan of the stage musical, I don’t see a ton of reasons to check this out.

RATING: 2.5/5

#70. Joker: Folie a Deux

It was a pretty ballsy move to follow up you Rated-R, Oscar winning smash hit with a film that pretty much shatters what a ton of people liked about it in the first place. Honestly, I respect the film for it, but my respect only goes so far. While Phoenix and Gaga are great together, the drab, shackled musical that surrounds them does not contain the same kinetic energy of the first. There are bold decisions here I do appreciate, but rarely did it ever compell me in a way that even its simplistic predecessor managed to do at times.

RATING: 2.5/5

FULL REVIEW

#69. Godzilla X Kong: The New Empire

I feel like a broken record, but this is yet another film that allows it’s boring, uninteresting human characters way down the narrative. There was potential here to allow the monsters to tell the story through purely physical performances, but they were unable to follow through. Still, when ‘Zilla and Kong are in action, it still remains quite fun, even introducing some unique dynamics involving new characters and new weapons. It’s a formula that kind of works, but probably not for much longer, as I don’t think a film like this can be regurgitated again going forward.

RATING: 2.5/5

FULL REVIEW

#68. Land of Bad

More like “Land of Not Bad!” This very generic military flick does have some bright spots, with its action being fairly brutal and the performances being pretty alright. I do think its tone can be all over the place, paticularly in a later scene where Russel Crowe is shopping for artisinal cheeses while his soldiers are about to be killed. It does its job well, and not much more beyond that, which is fine for an easy afternoon watch.

RATING: 2.5/5

#67. Maxxxine

Despite their acknowledgable flaws, I did enjoy X and Pearl, the first two films in Ti West’s decades spanning horror trilogy. But man, this third and final installment really felt like a step down. Other than its admirable neon glow and sparse but effective gore, the film feels cobbled together while failing to build upon the character of Maxxxine in a satisfying way, despite a haphazard climax that messily wraps everything up.

RATING: 2.5/5

FULL REVIEW

#66. Self Reliance

As an avid New Girl enjoyer, I’ll watch pretty much anything with Jake Johnson. The man has been dipping his toes in the realm of acting and directing, and while he hasn’t really knocked it out of the park as of late, he is starting to find his footing. This was fun and goofy, despite not really capturing a truly engaging style of comedy and visual style. This felt very reminiscent of Johnson’s prior film, Ride the Eagle, to a point where it felt like retread ground. A habitual fumbler is thrown into an abnormal circumstance in order to achieve some type of “prize” while, in reality, he’s meant to come to terms with his life decisions in the process. While the idea this time is a bit more outlandish, it doesn’t really tie into the film’s deeper intentions the way Ride the Eagle did. Here, the “romance” if you can call it that feels pretty forced, while the lead character himself has a lot of baggage yet still feels underdeveloped; never really making it clear what he wants on a deeper level. Still, the performances at least keep this watchable (love ya Biff), and some of the bits like the ninja PAs and the Ellen assassin are pretty hilarious. It’s clear there are certain themes of self-realization and regret that Johnson feels strongly drawn to, I just hope he can find ways to utilize those ideas towards something more worthwhile in the future. The director/star direction may be a bit too daunting for him at the moment. 

RATING: 2.5/5

#65. Smile 2

Despite feeling very similar to its predecessor, I enjoyed this lot more than the former. The struggles of the tortured pop star are far more engaging, due in part to an all-in performance from Scott. The scares aren’t always the most well structured, but the bulk of the film still maintains tight editing and admirable pacing, even if I think it goes on a bit long. At the end of the day I think it’s a super simple but effective melding of different horror tastes that I think will be genuine crowd pleaser for most. If this franchise is to keep going forward though, it needs a complete makeover of its premise and structure, because I really don’t see how this exact story can work a third time without me getting bored.

RATING: 2.5/5

FULL REVIEW

#64. Arthur the King

Exactly what you think it’s going to be, and sometimes that’s not the worst thing. Sure, it’s a bit emotionally manipulative, but I can look the other way for a good dog performance. It plays out very predictively and it doesn’t exactly get deeper into the subject’s character, but there is a few moments of genuine heart and jungle filmmaking. What can I say? Wahlberg made a decent dog movie.

RATING: 2.5/5

#63. Smile 2

Though very familiar to the first, the new focal point of a tragic popstar in the middle of a psychotic break is much more engaging and leads to some much more interesting scenarios. Naomi Scott kills it as both a horror girl and musical sensation, while the film continues its trend of sparse but welcome practical effects. The scares are pretty cheap and not very imaginative most of the time, but it’s sure to startle regardless.

RATING: 2.5

FULL REVIEW

#62. Kung Fu Panda 4

I wish there was more to say about this film. While it has the same energy and fluidity of the past three films, there’s a significant lack of heart when it comes to the characters we know and love as well as the newer additions. It’s not outright terrible, but certainly feels like the weakest in the series so far. Kids are probably going to love it though thanks to its action and farts. And us adults? Well we get treated to something truly special by the end. A cover of Brittney Spears’ …Baby One More Time by Jack Black’s band, Tenacious D. It’s one of those things you didn’t realize you wanted until you have it, and once you have it you wonder how you possibly could have ever lived without it.

RATING: 3/5

FULL REVIEW

#61. The Kitchen

Daniel Kaluuya comes in with a somewhat decent directorial debut, succeeding in capturing the smaller, grounded moments of community and culture in an almost slice of life story not often found in sci-fi. Yet this does leave the story and world feeling a bit undefined and aloof at times, where the stakes and rules of the world aren’t incredibly apparent. This restraint allows us to be on the same level as the characters, but occasionally it made the narrative feel a bit half baked. Killer soundtrack though.

RATING: 3/5

#60. Ezra

There’s certainly something to be said about how stories will see autistic child characters as tools for their parent’s character growth rather than actual individuals, but I think this film did okay. There is some genuine heart to it and it gets a little prickly in its politics, something that could have easily been a death knell for a film like this, though I do think the performances and authenticity do manage to rescue it.

RATING: 3/5

#59. The Primevals

So this is an interesting one. This was a passion project of David Allen, a pioneer in stop-motion animation in film and television that took over 50 years to complete. Allen unfortunately passed in 1999, so students and friends of the late director banned together to raise the money and manpower to finish this thing. It’s a super impressive and earnest callback to the pulpier days of large scale sets and stop motion creatures. Everything from the score to small nuances in the performances feel so era appropriate to what they were trying to make. While visually charming, the script and story definitely weighs the film down. A lot of dialogue is devoted to scientific babble and explaining things the film itself struggles to get across. There’s quite a lot of meandering in the middle and near the end, which is a shame because it keeps the film from being fully as entertaining as its visuals let on. Still, it’s a very cool execution that speaks to the endearing nature of creativity that left us decades ago.

RATING: 3/5

#58. Stopmotion

It seems unassuming at first, but Stopmotion really gets into some sicko shit as the film goes on. Following a woman trying to finish the stop motion film her strict and oppressive mother was working on before she died, the film goes down a fairly predictive route but one that’s laced with ample amounts of dread and disgust. With a name like that, you gotta deliver on some solid stop motion effects, and luckily the film does. There’s one character that progressively gets grosser and grosser as the film goes on, being made out of things like ash, raw meat, and eventually, human flesh. And there’s really no release, it is a bleak and depressing crawl through themes of artistic expression and even the lack thereof. It starts out pretty tame, but trust me, it gets aptly gross as pieces of the body get peeled and dismembered. It’s a bit more on the artsy side and can be a bit slow, but its unique implementation of two different artistic mediums is certainly admirable. 

RATING: 3/5

#57. Gladiator II

A decent follow-up to the original classic that doesn’t exactly come as close to matching it in both scope and innovation. It manages to be somewhat enjoyable as blades and blood fly, and the attention to detail, though noticeably more computer generated, is still admirable to see. The narrative is unfortunately not very strong, while a side-story playing out alongside it manages to be far more interesting and should have been the central plot. It’s a bit of fun, but execution is sorely missing the touch Ridley Scott could once administer.

RATING: 3/5

FULL REVIEW

#56. Megalopolis

You may be surprised to see this film so high on the list. Believe me, I kind of am too. This thing is a tonal and visual mess with goofy performances and a nonsense plot. Yet, there’s something quite admirable about the whole thing. Much like The Primevals, this is a passion project decades in the making that took Coppola’s own money to finance it. At the heart of this story is the dream of a better world where the artists are free to create and share their talents with the world. It casts aside the status quo as the inhibitor of progress and embraces unconventionalism as the gateway to the new society we desperately need…I think? It’s one of those films I’ll probably never watch again, yet I’m glad I saw it. There’s a ton of decade spanning ideas here that just don’t work in the modern day, yet the heart of what was trying to be accomplished certainly burned bright enough for me to see it.

RATING: 3/5

FULL REVIEW

#55. Wicked

A proven crowd pleaser that has more or less transferred the charm of the stage play to the screen, at least when it comes to the performances and characterizations. The two leads have incredible chemistry and nail everything from their dialogue to their songs, but my biggest detractor here comes from the film’s visual style. Flatly lit scenes, overblown backlight and occasionally uninteresting sequence structuring did dampen the magic for me a bit, but I will say I left this having enjoyed it more than I was anticipating.

RATING: 3/5

FULL REVIEW

#54. Immaculate

One of two pregnant nun horror movies to come out in 2024, with this one being led by the on-the-rise Sydney Sweeney. She continues to expand her range of what she’s capable of tackling, and I think she manages to sell the horror and dread of her situation fairly well. That being said, the plot is still very generic despite a clever little spin on it. The presentation is nothing too special, while many of its scares lean far too heavily on loud noises rather than consistent dread. While Sweeney excels in the loud, pained moments, her quieter, more reserved scenes didn’t exactly come together for me. She’s good, but I couldn’t always see past Euphoria or Madame Web in the role unfortunately. It’s pretty by the books, but has an air to it that makes it much more of a crowd pleaser than its competition.

RATING: 3/5

#53. Alien: Romulus

This worked better as an homage to the series rather than a complete, original identity. While most of its callbacks aren’t too terrible, there is a significant amount of weight put on the past that works to hold this thing up at times. The main cast is definitely the saving grace, with Cailee Spaeny and David Jonsson being remarkable together. When it does finally get to its horror elements, Alvarez certainly impresses with the practicality behind the setting and creature work (particularly with that end monstrosity). There is a character in this “played” by a dead actor that felt wholly unneeded, with his existence only really serving as a callback for the sake of a callback. Overall, it’s a fun time, though not one of the more unique outings in the franchise.

RATING: 3/5

#52. Infested

A tight French horror film that’s bound to make your skin crawl. A small apartment becomes the home of an ever-growing horde of spiders, which continue to grow and devour those that get caught in their webs. While the horror is pretty decent, the real pull for me was the comradery between the main characters. The actually feel like real people, and their chemistry with one another helps sell the horror of the situation. I think it takes a bit to really get going and doesn’t completely go crazy with its setup, but this is still a very solid creature flick.

RATING: 3/5

#51. Beetlejuice Beetlejuice

Now this was a welcome and pleasant return to form for Tim Burton, managing to capture just enough of the charm of the original to make this quite a good time. Most of the returning cast does a very solid job, though many of the new characters don’t exactly manage to leave much of a mark. There is a tinge of overstuffed narrative here, as many of the film’s moving parts don’t exactly converge in a super successful way. Nevertheless, this felt the closest to classic Burton we’ve gotten in what feels like a decade, and I was happy to see this was as good as it is.

RATING: 3/5

FULL REVIEW

#50. Deadpool & Wolverine

While its reliance on references and self-referential humor doesn’t generate the most interesting direction this film could go, as a comic book movie fan of 20+ years, this still managed to be a lot of fun. The Reynolds and Jackman dynamic is just as fun onscreen as it had been offscreen, as the two prove to be perfect foils of one another. This stroll down memory lane is filled with plenty of charming returns and shocking appearances no one could have guessed, but it also seemed like these inclusions were given top priority over other things like telling a compelling story or being visually interesting. It’s certainly a bit of fun especially if you’re in the know, aka your mother’s basement, but I do have to wonder about the precedent this sets for the future of Marvel’s films. Nostalgia is a hell of a drug, and Marvel may just become the biggest peddler of it on the street for years to come.

RATING: 3/5

FULL REVIEW

#49. Trap

It has been a hot minute since I could say I actually enjoyed a M. Night Shyamalan film, but there’s just something about Trap, man. Whether he’s in on the joke or not, M. Night managed to find the right tonal strike to match his particular form of writing (purposefully alien or just plain bad depending on who you ask). The silliness and seriousness work so well alongside one another, with their even being a little something to say about the parental drive to make our kids happy. It’s fairly surface level, but I enjoyed the framework it’s built around. Hartnett is also doing some all time faces here. He’s at his best when his back is against the wall rather than trying to play the murder genius trope. Unfortunately, the film remembers it’s technically a crime thriller by the third act and the seriousness ramps up to a point where the comedy comes more from the melodrama rather than the bizarre scenarios of the first two acts. That, coupled with some very generous leaps in logic, make the ending a bit all over the place. I really wish it found a way to stay in its one location for the whole film, but this is easily one of my favorite new releases from the director since Split.

RATING: 3/5

#48. My Old Ass

This was a pretty sweet comedy about regretting the past before you’ve even left it. The smalltown setting is so expertly portrayed from both sides of the coin; an outdated prison meant to be escaped, and a memory of the past that manages to be just as fleeting. It kind of goes exactly where you expect it to, but that’s not always a bad thing when you have a superb pairing of leads to guide you through this coming-of-age tale of falling for a guy literally named Chad. Good use of a Justin Bieber song at least.

RATING: 3/5

#47. Bad Boys: Ride of Die

Though I’m not a huge fan of the franchise, I’m always into new directors with the sauce coming in and whooping ass. That’s essentially what we get from Adil and Bilall, who manage to go balls to the wall with frenetic energy and innovative camera work that manages to elevate and otherwise basic story. Smith and Laurence still deliver prime comedy together, as age and mortality slowly begin to catch up with them. This was definitely a pleasant surprise from the world of action films this year, and I gotta be honest, I didn’t even think about the slap once.

RATING: 3/5

FULL REVIEW

#46. Road House

This film really became an unexpected guilty pleasure of mine. It’s goofy and dumb as hell, but actually manages to be a bit of fun despite being fairly underbaked. There’s hints of Gyllenhaal’s character having a bit more depth to him that never really gets explored, but he’s charming enough to make a particularly one note character work. Can’t say the same for McGregor though. I don’t know what he was told to do on set, but if he was trying to be either funny or intimidating, it just doesn’t work. Some of the fights are okay, with fluid camerawork and interesting setups, but others don’t really have the same juice. I do think the camerawork and editing can sometimes be the villain of these scenes, as the quick cuts and hectic camerawork occasionally lessens the impact of certain hits. Yet it makes up for it by going over the top in a few places. The story probably could have been given another rewrite to trim the fat and be a bit more tight, but this is actually one of the more enjoyable dad-core films to come out in a while.

RATING: 3/5

#45. Am I Okay?

What a year for self-realization in your adult years on film. Your enjoyment may really hinge on whether or not you’re down with Dakota Johnson’s slightly off putting quirkiness (I am), but even still, I found this to be a super sweet approach to self discovery later in your life in a way that doesn’t diminish its message through stereotypical narrative beats and cliches. It’s not earth shattering, but it’s the right amount of emotional and charming to make this a pretty easy watch.

RATING: 3/5

#44. Suncoast

While it doesn’t get nearly as deep into the ramifications of life, death and burdens as much as I hoped, it’s still easy to be moved by this film. A lot of this comes down to the mother/daughter relationship of Linney and Parker; it’s prickly and selfish yet there’s an understanding in grief that’s begging to be tackled by both. Harrelson is just kinda there and doesn’t add much unfortunately, but the leading ladies are the heart and soul of it all. It does get a bit cliche at times, but the emotional moments are the right amount of heavy to not completely crush your soul, but at least give you a tear or two.

RATING: 3/5

#43. Marmalade

A bit torn on this because I really liked where the film ended up going. It’s a bit of Bonnie and Clyde and a bit The Usual Suspects, but the way it makes its way through the narrative isn’t always the smoothest. The performances are great and the writing is consistently witty, but it doesn’t all feels pretty predictable and straightforward. That is until the film gets flipped on its head and makes it all worthwhile. It’s just that the majority of the film plays it straight and narrow, and while it does lead to a worthwhile payoff, you’re still stuck with a good chunk of the film that doesn’t manage to be as exciting. Regardless, it’s still a fun watch, with potentially Joe Keery’s best performance.

RATING: 3/5

#42. Civil War

This is a bit of a weird one, because on the surface, this looks a like political thriller meant to take the heightened emotions of today’s climate and put them head to head in an explosive, self-destructive epic. And if you go into it look at it like that, you may find the film void of any real commentary on the state of the world (which is kind of the truth). Maybe you can chock that expectation up to the marketing, but you won’t find that kind of idealogical warfare here despite it being littered with bloodshed and carnage. It’s more about the apathy of war. The how and the why isn’t important, but the way it’s being treated is. We follow photojournalists with no explicit allegiance to either side, simply there to capture the brutal candidness of war. Their cold, often uncarring demeanor echoes the consumption of tragedy we experience every day; often it’s used to push our own messages and desires. An empire is falling right before tbeir eyes, and all people want to do is either blissfully distance themselves from it or find what they can gain for it. That being said, the objectivety of the film did make me walk away without a truly poignant message to mull over because the film doesn’t really attempt to give any answers or even nudges in the right direction. It’s still a solid film, but one that is perhaps the most misinterpretted of the year.

RATING: 3/5

#41. Lisa Frankenstein

A fun and campy throwback to 80s horror, anchored by goofy and endearing performances and a razor wit script. It’s an aesthetic joy to see, with the neons and the pastels of the 80s properly replicated, with a little spinkling of classic gothic and Tim Burton thrown in there for good measure. For how morbid and dark it can be for a PG-13 film, I wish it did get a little grittier, a little meaner, or at least had a bit more to say like Diablo Cody’s previous film, Jennifer’s Body. Still, a silly and spooky time to be had.

RATING: 3/5

FULL REVIEW

#40. Abigail

Despite initially appearing to be a low-budget, straightforward piece of digestible commercial horror, this ain’t no Blumhouse picture. Honestly, I had a lot of fun with this film’s heavy violence and dark humor. The ensemble is a great collection neredowells and low-lives that can actually make you give a damn about them. Of course, Alisha Wier as the titular vampire girl is terrific, easily earning herself a spot as one of the most standout child actors in a horror film. Thank God for the R rating, because it allows this film to get exactly as bloody as it needs to be. While it’s nothing groundbreaking or new to see, it definitely packs a lot of fun into a small, fanged package.

RATING: 3/5

#39. The First Omen

The second of the pregnant nun horror films of 2024, and the one I happened to like the most. I was shocked too, as I don’t exactly expect much from prequels to famous horror movies made decades later, but I was pleasantly surprised by how well made this was. It has way more of an indie arthouse feel to it, with a tad slower pace that’s lined with the kind of impending doom that comes from religious institutions being not what they seem. The imagery at work here is quite frightening and disturbing, really amplifying the helplessness our main character feels. This paranoia culminates into a terrifying unraveling of religious intent that’s highlighted by a standout scene many have rightfully compared to the subway scene in Possession. I won’t say this is more challenging than Immaculate, as truthfully they’re both on similar levels, but I just happened to like the presentation of this one a bit more.

RATING: 3/5

#38. Twisters

Though it doesn’t reach the same heights of dad-movie legacy sequel that Top Gun: Maverick achieved, I still thought Twisters was a pretty good time, and maybe even a slight improvement on the original. Of course, there’s only so many places you can take a disaster movie, and luckily the film only tows the line of being completely ridiculous instead of going in head first. The presentation of the landscapes and the moments of cataclysm are presented in such a big, effective way that actually manages to get the sweat going. The characters aren’t exactly the most memorable, and I at times hated the on-the-nose nature of some of the film’s soundtrack, but disaster films can easily be a lot worse, yet this one pulls itself ahead ever so slightly.

RATING: 3/5

#37. Orion and the Dark

Charlie Kauffman isn’t exactly the most approachable writer when it comes to films for grown-ups, so I had some concerns about how effective he could in a children’s film. But he does succeed in crafting a fun fairytale that could easily appeal to children while not talking down to them. The idea isn’t the most structurally sound, as the personification of the different elements of the night can feel a bit half-baked at times. But, as an adult, I welcomed the humor and wit of the film’s writing, getting just exstastential enough to not be a complete turnoff for younger audiences.

RATING: 3/5

#36. The Instigators

A pretty servicable, middle of the road crime comedy made more memorable thanks to the lead performances and humor. It’s Boston as all hell, which works great for Damon and Affleck. Love a good, heavy New England accent. There really isn’t a ton to talk about, as the plot and narrative flow is pretty genaric, but a stacked cast keeps this thing from ever really being that dull.

RATING: 3.5/5

#35. Woman of the Hour

A pretty solid directorial debut for Anna Kendrick! It manages to be pretty unnerving through sheer implication, though it isn’t afraid to delve into the horrors of psychopathy whithout crossing a gratuitous or exploitative line. While it doesn’t exactly get much deeper than that, it’s good for a decent thrill where the “based on a true story” tagline actually feels somewhat genuine (you can actually find the episode of The Dating Game this guy was on on YouTube).

RATING: 3.5/5

#34. La Chimera

Hot damn, what a year for Josh O’Connor. His range and talents are truly unique, and I can’t wait to see where he goes from here. From what I can gather, this is a capitalism commentary that shows the vicious nature of both buyer and seller; in this case, focusing on the world of artifacts. O’Conner’s Arthur is in search for what happens after life, finding intrigue in the remains of past identities as he himself exits a “life”, so to speak. Might be completely missing the mark here, as for how laid back and genuine the film is, I didn’t find it the easiet to read. Maybe that can be chocked up to being on a multi-hour flight when I watched this, but it remains solid nonetheless.

RATING: 3.5/5

#33. Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes

Even without Matt Reeves at the helm, the series about apes on the rise still manages to chug along strongly. It houses some of the best special effects in Hollywood, bringing its fun primate cast to life with hardly any threads to be seen. Its questions of coexistance feel poignant and leaves the series in an exciting spot to go further with its world and story. It does lack some of the grit and meditations the other films possess, yet it still continues their trends of being one of the most impressive feats of motion capture animation.

REVIEW: 3.5/5

FULL REVIEW

#32. The Book of Clarence

I really dug everything about this from the performances, set design, cinematography, soundtrack and its satirization on faith, knowledge and belief. And then the last 20 minutes happen. I think the point either got away from the story or the story never truly knew what the point was. It didn’t exactly leave on a very complete notion that either re-affirms or disputes the themes in a compelling way. Either way, this was still a lot of fun for the most part, reminding me of a cross between The Life of Brian and Dogma. I also just enjoys films where Benedict Cumberbatch comes out of nowhere.

RATING: 3.5/5

#31. The Fall Guy

Hot off the heels of playing one of the funniest comedic roles of the decade so far, Ryan Gosling finds himself as a stuntman trying to solve a crime and win over the heart of a director in The Fall Guy. This is one of the better cheesy action comedies that actually manage to deliver on both action and comedy fairly well. Gosling is of course stellar, with his chemistry with Emily Blunt feeling both charming and believable. Not only is the film a love letter to the kind of silly action films we don’t seem to get much anymore, it’s also a loving tribute to the underappreciated roles on film sets that make the magic happen, particularly stunt performers. It almost made me miss my days on set, until I remembered the 16 hour shifts, the shady payment processes, and nearly getting hit by cars while putting those stupid yellow signs up. My biggest fear was that this film would lack many practical stunts and just completely undermine the profession, but no, there’s actually quite a few legit set pieces that helped ground the film with its intentions. Sure, their intensity is a tad dampened by all the special effects surrounding them, but they’re still impressive. The comedy is fairly solid, not being overtly obvious or lame while still being kind of corny in an endearing way. I think this was the definition of a crowd pleaser that did not get enough love while in theaters.

RATING: 3.5/5

#30. Heretic

Aka: Athiest DESTROYS Mormon Girls With Facts and Logic! A film this involved in religious discussion runs the risk of being either preachy or overbearing, but this film seems to nail a solid middle ground that makes good points yet manages to push back against them as well. Possessing one of the most fun scripts of the year, Heretic allows Hugh Grant to play the charming, know-it-all dickhead he’s born to play, and you can tell he’s having a blast in the role. While not containing a ton of horrific imagery, the film does manage to keep you on edge with very intentful cinematography and sound design, often forcing you to spend an uncomfortable amount of time locked in to a scenario. I think as it goes on it gets less interesting, but the surprises do hit for the most part and constantly left me guessing where the film would go, even if the destination wasn’t as wild as maybe it could have been.

RATING: 3.5/5

#29. Drive-Away Dolls

A brisk and naughty roadtrip adventure, feeling reminscent of Coen Brothers past (though on one brother is in the driver seat this go around). Margaret Qualley and Geraldine Viswanathan have tremendous chemistry as two sides of a competing sexual spectrum. The story is fast paced and presented in a goofy but enjoyable way, with creative transitions and leanings on 90s nostalgia and Clinton-era sensibilities, with the film poking fun at the latter with its crude and rude comedy. Though fairly simplistic in its narrative, it has a lot of fun with itself and manages to be one of the most humerous films of the year. This is a standout year for Qualley, who we’ll be talking about more later down the list (sorry I never got around to Kinds of Kindness).

RATING: 3.5/5

FULL REVIEW

#28. A Quiet Place: Day One

You would think a plot as straight forward as A Quiet Place would have little room for expansion, but this film proves otherwise. The human element to the film is quite strong, taking a much different approach to survival than the previous films. Lupita N’yongo and Joseph Quinn make an unlikely but endearing pairing, each with their own motivations for navigating the apocalypse. While it may not feel as inventive as the first, it still brings new ideas and imagery to the table that felt very welcome. Seeing a city like New York slowly fade away amidst an alien invasion is quite haunting at times, yet the struggles of its citizens feel realized and personal, particularly Nyong’o’s nihilistic but heartfelt mission. It does feel like retreading ground at times, but this film definitely succeeded where it needed to with its characters.

RATING: 3.5/5

#27. MadS

A shame I caught this right after Halloween ended, as it easily would have gotten a shout-out in my Best Horror Films of 2024 video. It’s a super invigorating and unique take on the zombie genre, all done in (allegedly?) five takes to simulate one long, continuous shot. The amount of locations and traveling done in the film is genuinely insanse and I have no clue how you can even pull off something this large in scale without shutting down an entire town. This is far more of a paranoid, bad trip of a film than a straightforward zombie story, which I enjoyed because you get to actively experience the degradation of an infected individual in such a haunting and sad way. Love the station scene from Possession? There’s like three of them here, and you know what? They’re all pretty great.

RATING: 3.5/5

#26. Wicked Little Letters

The internet didn’t create hostile, anonymous posting. It’s always been in our blood. Olivia Coleman and Jessie Buckley make for quite the rivals, with neither really approving of one another’s views and ways of life, but their approaches to dealing with them differ drastically. It’s a hysterical romp containing some of the most colorful string of swears and insults you’ll hear all year. Sometimes you just need to call people c*nts, and we should really be embracing that more.

RATING: 3.5/5

#25. Sometimes I Think About Dying

One of those films where you know not much will happen, yet it still finds a way to cut deep. It captures social isolation and depression fairly well, while sharing the different spectrums of monotony; the trivial as well as the little moments of warmth. Daisy Ridley barely says a word and it’s easily the best performance I’ve seen from her. The dreary backdrop of Oregon has that aura where you know nothing monumental will happen here, which manages to be both comforting and sad. It’s so genuine and earnest, so funny and off-putting, with a quiet but ringing ending. We just want to know we’re being seen, whether we think we want to be or not.

RATING: 3.5/5

#24. I Used to be Funny

Two Phoebe Bridgers songs in one movie? Are you trying to kill everyone??? Honestly, the comedy was probably the weakest part of the film, but the dramatic and very depressing narrative actually felt very mature and respectful. Rachel Sennot continues to impress with her authenticity, proving she is far more than a one-note comic. I was expecting a similar vibe to Shiva Baby and got bitch slapped for that assumption. Don’t make the same mistake I did, but do check this out for a sad but hopeful story of living through trauma and fighting your way to yourself again.

RATING: 3.5/5

#23. We Live in Time

Better than living in a society. It’s pretty straightforward, but the Pugh/Garfield chemistry is undeniable. Shown through a non-linear timeline that plays with expectations and foreshadows the inevitable, I think this did a terrific job with portraying tragedy and the raging against the helplessness and the redefinement of your life it causes. Super sweet, authentic and home to genuinely one of the best birth scene I’ve ever witness, this ticked almost all the boxes for me.

RATING: 3.5/5

#22. Problemista

Such a creative and dream-like take on scratching your way through the nonsense rules that make up our society. Director and star Julio Torres is certainly one to watch, possessing such a great comedic eye for the absurd that’s both out there and close to home. Tilda Swinton is, and I mean this as a compliment, playing one of the hardest to watch characters I’ve ever seen. She’s so cartoonishly up her own ass and unaware of herself, and yet I know people who are just like this. For how out there and nutty it gets, it never forgets the human heart that grounds all of it and makes this film truly something special.

RATING: 3.5/5

#21. The Bikeriders

A surgical dive into the hierarchies and operations of an ever-growing club whose foundation continues to weaken despite their growth in power. It hopes to shed light on the enigmatic pull these groups have and what draws people to join them, all while finding vulnerability beneath the leather clad, machismo front. Plus, it’s just a smorgasbord of the most aggressive midwestern accents, connected to some truly stellar performances that move you, entertain you and perfectly represent the time period. It doesn’t really get too introspective nor does it really present any new takes on the aesthetic, but sometimes just a solid film with some great stars is all you need.

RATING: 3.5/5

FULL REVIEW

#20. Strange Darling

This is easily one of the best looking and well constructed thriller films of 2024. This nonlinear game of cat and mouse between a man and a woman is more than meets the eye, though what you see on the surface is still pretty great. Shot on film and utilizing a smart and striking color scheme, Strange Darling is putting maximum effort into its aesthetic, something I wish more films, especially horror, would commit to. The film’s fractured narrative generates an engaging mystery, playing on tropes and boundaries in a way that just might spin you for a loop. The two leads are incredible, the directing is smart and intentional, and it even has a little layer of dark comedy underneath it all. All the while, it gives some potentially prickly commentary on consent, power dynamics and manipulation. It’s not always what it appears to be, and I love it for it.

RATING: 3.5/5

FULL REVIEW

#19. Monkey Man

I don’t care if this was just an excuse for Dev Patel to show off his abs and fighting moves; he’s more than earned it. The director and star weaves a story of revenge that is elevated by the injection of poignant Indian culture, a tantalizing soundtrack, and some highly entertaining fight scenes. Patel shows true competence and talent as a director here, rarely ever settling for mediocre shot compositions or transitions. These action sequences are gritty, bareknuckle and highly stylish, really scratching the itch John Wick left us with. But don’t think of this as a John Wick clone, as there is so much unique identity to the film. The film touches upon the political climate in India while also taking time to showcase marginalized communities like the hijra, transgender warriors devoted to the belief in the third gender. The story can be a bit messy at times, but I think that also fits well with the rough and tumble aesthetic. In short; it goes ape shit.

RATING: 3.5/5

FULL REVIEW

#18. Stress Positions

Films centering around life during the pandemic often felt very gimmicky and cheap to me. However, Stress Positions manages to take the setting and use it to form a film that captures the fatigue and restlessness that came with lockdown in a fairly funny and kind of depressing way. It’s quite a claustrophobic film that manages to utilize its uncomfortable nature to pretty solid comedic effect. None of the characters are exactly likable, but there’s something about them that keeps you watching. They are honest representations of the frustrations that came from being cooped up inside for a year, covering the spectrums of seriousness we all saw during that time. The characters do bad things, but you can understand where they’re coming from; that desperation to live the life they want while forces beyond their control hinder them. What makes the film so smart is how this is tied to concerns beyond the pandemic; religion, gender, identity and responsibility for others all share common experiences of repression. The script elaborates on these ideas through biting, witty dialogue courtesy of first time director Theda Hammel, who also edited the film and composed its magnetic soundtrack. I know we all want to forget those few years, but I think they’re worth revisiting in this weird, chaotic, aggressively horny film.

RATING: 4/5

#17. How to Have Sex

An honest portrayal of girlhood; both the good and the bad. It portrays its characters with frustrating authenticity, but also makes room for genuine sympathy. It’s a summer break filled with bad decisions that aren’t just rooted in desires to be young and dumb, but to avoid the unfortunate reality that awaits you once you leave your fever dream. Those wants of being seen, desired and understood lead to traumatic circumstances that feel easy to brush off as simple irresponsibility, but the film knows there’s much, much more to it than that. This manages to be quite the rollercoaster; starting off fun and relatable before taking a dive into the realms of depressing and relatable (the bad kind this time). I think we tend to forget the pressures teenagers face amidst their carefree lives, and how a lot of those pressures are often self-inflicted by sociatal norms that can haunt you into adulthood. Yet there’s so much grace and understanding on display of this here, and while I am not represented in the central focal point of the film, it managed to resonate with me regardless.

RATING: 4/5

#16. The Wild Robot

Just when you think Dreamworks has hit its stylistic peak with the most recent Puss in Boots film, they come right back with another stellar, gorgeous film. It’s incredibly touching and cutesy, but holds a respectable amount of maturity in how it handles death and living up to the impossible standards placed on us by societal structures, specifically with motherhood. Yet I don’t think it ever drifts too far off course of being a kid’s film, containing enough silly talking critters that deliver halfway decent comedy and morals.

RATING: 4/5

#15. Rebel Ridge

At the risk of sounding too hyperbolic, I would reckon this is one of the most important action films of the last few years. Sure, the setup of lone man versus crooked cops isn’t exactly original, but how it goes about the narrative framework is truly remarkable. This is an action film that manages to deliver on thrilling, well constructed fight sequences without taking a single life. This more than just a gimmick, however, as it digs to the root of the antagonists’ identity, which isn’t exactly foreign to the current state of affairs the world is in today. A station of high and mighty, trigger-happy cops is built upon a foundation of “by any means necessary”, evident by how they decide to get our main character’s attention in the opening scene by hitting him with their car. Yet our ex-Marine protagonist, played intelligently by Aaron Pierre, illustrates the non-lethal alternatives to getting things done, as he goes through every violent encounter with the intention to subdue in the most non-aggressive way he possibly can. It’s such a smart way to build a film as a parallel to real life, and it never stops being entertaining, frustrating and eye-opening.

RATING: 4/5

#14. Oddity

It feels like it’s been forever since horror movies have floored me enough to have them in my top 10, and Oddity is the first of a few. This is a bit of a supernatural mystery that takes its time to get going, yet never feels like it’s dragging its feet. Set in Ireland, the film follows a blind clairvoyant trying to get to the bottom of her sister’s murder through otherworldly means. The tension is palpable throughout, but the real star of the film is the tight script, which gradually lets information slip out little by little. It’s one of the smartest scripts I’ve seen from the genre in a while, with each development in the plot leaving me more and more enthralled. But this guessing game is also home to a slowly building uncertainty, one that keeps you guessing as to what kind of monster we’re dealing with here; man, or something else? Plus the sound design’s minimalistic approach is so, so effective, paired with some haunting imagery that really gives it a punch. It goes by quickly but still has latched itself onto me. It takes the familiar haunted house formula, condenses it, and does something wholly unique with it in a way I absolutely loved. While not the most visceral horror film out there, this is great if you enjoy a good mystery and drawn out dread.

RATING: 4/5

#13. The Last Stop in Yuma County

I’m a simple man. I see Jim Cummings in a movie, I watch it. And while he’s not in the director’s chair like I’m used to, this still has all the elements of his films that I love. This is a claustrophobic, hilarious crime film that may seem by the numbers at first, but the last half of the film spirals out of control into one bad decision after another. There’s so many moving pieces in the form of new characters that start to trickle into the narrative, but everything flows so well and remains tight throughout. And like I said, Jim Cummings is the star of the show, using his usual brand of pathetic and neurotic sensibilities to really take this thing off the rails into darkly funny territory. It’s a very quick watch that manages to fly by, remaining engaging and entertaining all the way up to its explosive end.

RATING: 4/5

#12. I Saw the TV Glow

Easily the most out-there film I saw this year, yet one that absolutely rattled me after sitting with it for a while. On the surface, this is a coming of age drama that can elicit several relatable memories of suburbia, hyperfixations, and the heavy expectations that come with conforming into societal norms. Yet there is so, so much more working underneath the surface, and that’s where the horror comes from. It’s obviously allegorical for the trans experience, but I don’t think that topic has ever been utilized to instill so much dread and nausea into a story before, at least from what I’ve seen. Amidst the gorgeous use of color and the unique soundtrack is a fear that you’ve suppressed the true you and will never come to terms with that as you continue to conform to the standards that surround you. There are moments in this film that twisted my stomach in a way I hadn’t felt all year, even though the central idea doesn’t directly apply to me. But through all the darkness and dread is a shining light of hope; a reminder that it’s never over and there is still time to find yourself, no matter how old you are. Some will be turned off by the abstract and ethereal way it presents these ideas, especially with how some of the characters act and speak like exposition devices rather than characters. Even still, this is one of the most bold films of the year that has kept me thinking about it a ton since I first saw it, and that certainly means something.

RATING: 4/5

FULL REVIEW

#11. Hundreds of Beavers

I love a good throwback, but rarely do those kind of films feel genuine in their inspirations. But if you’re a fan of Looney Tunes and Charlie Chaplin, then you’re sure to find the fun in this bonkers homage. Essentially a live action cartoon that’s shot in black and white and utilizes a mixture of digital backgrounds, practical sets and big headed animal costumes, this is sure to be one of the most unique looking films you’ll see all year. The purposefully cheaply made aesthetic is utilized in hilarious and ingenious ways, crafting a slapstick throwback that hits you with rapid fire sight gags and physical comedy at an impressive rate, meaning even if it serves you up the occasional dud, the film moves quickly forward onto the next joke. The upfront goofiness lets you know exactly what you’re getting yourself into from the beginning, yet the film still finds ways to surprise you by continuing to bounce off the wall with cartoonish, kinetic energy. This really feels like a film born to be a cult classic, perfect for late viewings in rowdy theaters, but don’t wait for a moment like that. See it as soon as you can if you’re looking for some of the most fun you’ll have all year.

RATING: 4/5

FULL REVIEW

#10. Snack Shack

A slice of 90s summer nostalgia from Adam Rehmeier, director of The Bunny Game (maybe don’t Google that one). This is such a fun, fast pace, nostalgic comedy anchored by the chemistry between lead stars Conor Sherry and and the ever-on-the-rise Gabriel LaBelle. Their volatile but heartfelt relationship reminded me a lot of Ed Edd n’ Eddy; a couple of go-getters constantly finding ways to maximize their profit through various schemes. From horse races to basement brewed beer, the duo share an ingenuity and determination that is a blast to see played out and challenged. Their dynamic is constructed by a tag team of both stellar performances and a great, whip-crack script that manages to balance both comedy and melodrama very well. On top of that, the film is a loving ode to the simpler days of childhood, filled with swimming, hot dogs and love triangles. It’s a cozy watch that still manages to pack an emotional punch, even if these swings can feel a bit over dramatic. Still, going from one of the most unpleasant watches of the 2010s to this wholesome slice of life certainly shows range as a director.

RATING: 4/5

#9. Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga

This wins the award for the most mistreated film of the year, though I can understand why. Following up Mad Max: Fury Road is a near impossible task, and I think George Miller knew this. So the final product seems to have disappointed some expecting another Fury Road, which I am okay with not getting because…we already have Fury Road. The film’s focus on character over concept crafts a vastly different odyssey that still maintains the carnage and insanity that we loved about the prior film. Anya Taylor-Joy and Alyla Browne do a solid job at portraying the tragic Furiosa through multiple stages of her life, each bringing something unique to the role while building upon the character’s journey. Then there’s Chris Hemsworth, delivering a kooky, unhinged performance as Dementus that steals the show whenever he’s on screen; potentially my favorite performance of the year. While there’s a much more prevalent reliance on CGI effects this time around, I think this gives the visual style of the film a warped, punk vibe that accurately reflects the insanity of the wasteland.  The action is still gloriously over the top, with no shortage of impressive stunts and set pieces to gawk at, like the tanker ambush. It’s a tad messy, but I think it’s still one of the most fun and creative films of the year that absolutely deserves a second chance.

RATING: 4/5

FULL REVIEW

#8. Nosferatu

Finally, a modern vampire movie with some teeth on it. Yeah, I’m a big Eggers fan boy, but seriously, he absolutely nails the gothic aesthetic of the source material; from both a stylistic and narrative approach. While it does feel a tad derivative of its predecessors, Eggers still manages to instill his own signature brand of era accuracy and looming dread. Count Orlok, played by resident chameleon Bill Sarsgard, is a force of nature, representing the dark embodiment of lust, manipulation and desire. The psychosexual nature of vampire stories has never felt as haunting, as its utilization as a dark shroud that masks itself as love gives this things layers beyond a simple battle of good and evil. Perhaps Orlok is not the most horrifying thing here; rather, it’s Lily-Rose Depp’s Ellen’s desire for him that she cannot come to terms with herself. Star-studded across the board and home to some of the darkest meditations on evil since Eggers’ The Witch, this stands as a triumph for one of the director’s most sought after achievements; full frontal male nudity.

REVIEW: 4/5

#7. Memoir of a Snail

Damn dude, what a punch in the gut. Adam Elliot is known for his dark stop motion films about childhood and growing old, and his latest outing is no different, but no less effective. The unique, unconventional character and world designs are a joy to see, with so much humanity injected into them; warts and all. At times it’s comically bleak, drawing both uncomfortable laughs and tear buildups depending on the moment; maybe both at times too. There’s so much relatable sadness to unpack here, as I’m trying to remember the last time an animated film cut this deep on a personal level. Yet it still gives off an incredible sense of hope; a reassurance that we’re all on this dumb little rock together and our experiences aren’t as unique as we may think. Everything from the beautifully crafted animation to the gut wrenching vocal performances to the absurd but grounded comedy hit so successfully. This really is something special that you owe it to yourself to check out when you can. Maybe just bring some tissues and be open to the idea of seeing snail ejaculation on screen (yes, really).

RATING: 4/5

#6. Love Lies Bleeding

Something I meant to bring up earlier is that this has been a phenomenal year for female directors. Sure, there have been tons of terrific films of the past few years directed by women, but their work has really seemed to make their way to the forefront for a chance. Love Lies Bleeding is one of those successes. This is both a sexy and grimey crime noir that manages to capture the right amount of pulp to create a highly entertaining, aggressive good time.  Kristen Stewart and Katy O’Brien’s erotic but highly combustible relationship is full of lust, insecurities and deceit, which makes each progression in their companionship magnetic and stressful. Both are trapped in this wasteland of a town for one reason or another, and both open each other up to a possibility of hope and happiness they once thought was out of reach. The dusty, dirty aesthetic only adds to the stress, creating a rather isolated setting that tries to dash any sense of hope the moment it sparks. It definitely gets a little out there, taking some big swings by the end that may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but personally I loved it. It’s always great to see an unapologetic LGBTQ film that isn’t afraid to get dirty and gross in between the hot stuff.

#5. Longlegs

While I do think the masterful marketing behind this film created nearly impossible expectations to meet, I still really enjoyed this horror crime thriller, finding it to be one of the scariest films of the year. At times, it feels deeply insidious to watch, showcasing the horrors of real life in a way that leaves you incredibly uncomfortable. It excels at building tension and letting empty space create implications for your mind to stress over. Each scene cut feels like a threat where you don’t know what’s waiting for you around the corner, while the overblown sound design keeps you on edge even when nothing traditionally scary is happening. Maika Monroe is a solid conduit for us to experience this trauma with, while Nicolas Cage brings the satanic drag madness as the titular killer. There were so many moments where my breath just left me, as the film expertly allows your mind to do the heavy lifting of crafting what nightmares await you, all while never letting you grow comfortable in places where you think you’re safe. The story is fairly straightforward but leaves enough mystery to mull over until the 3rd act lays all the cards on the table, which may disappoint some hoping for a bit more vagueness. But despite that, this story of evil invading our present and past is remarkably effective, making for one of the best serial killer films of the past few years.

RATING: 4/5

FULL REVIEW

#4. The Substance

But my favorite horror film of the year has gotta be this batshit film all about living your best life. Gratuitous as all hell and as subtle as fireworks during a church service, the film wears its schlocky, B-movie heritage proudly on its beautiful, horrendous skin. It gets incredibly gross at times, as flesh gets pierced, stretched and malformed in truly sickening ways, heightened by grade A practical effects and revolting sound design. But what makes the film so compelling is the dynamic between stars Demi Moore and Margaret Qualley; two fame hungry starlets vying over the same consciousness, often forgetting they’re the different sides of the same coin. While it’s crude and juvenile at times, there’s still a solid underlying message about aging and self-hatred that really shines through the grotesque visuals. It’s incredibly goofy, yet some of its more serious scenes, like Elisabeth trying to get ready for her date, show the true horror of our own warped view of ourselves. The film’s presentation is also uniquely maximalist, going big and in-your-face in a way I don’t see a ton of horror films do anymore. With its intense closeups and its striking color palette, it feels so fresh and unique despite a relatively familiar premise. It’s definitely not for the weak stomached, but I suggest they watch anyway because that just sounds funny.

RATING: 4/5

FULL REVIEW

#3. Anora

Sean Baker’s ascent amongst the indie scene has finally paid off with his most recent, Palme D’or winning film. Anora feels remarkably more approachable than his past films, yet he never deters from the controversial subject matters and communities he has focused on over the past several years. That down to Earth, personable energy is still found here, as he dives into the life of exotic dancers and the mega-wealthy. This is a highly entertaining film that may just be the funniest film of the year, though you may not expect it at first. The first chunk of the film plays out like a scrappy, against-all-odds young romance that eventually spirals into a nutty, borderline slapstick comedy that boils with steaming frustrations courtesy of the film’s supporting cast. Mikey Madison is every bit of the heart of this film, however. She is someone who is looking for her way out of the seedy line of work she’s found herself in, but her motives and her willingness to go as far as she can are constantly called into question, even by herself. Her journey of trying to convince herself of the love she thinks she feels because it could be her proverbial light at the end of the tunnel is quite compelling, even when it’s posted up alongside the silliness the film eventually leans into. But everything comes to a head in a moving final scene that encapsulates all of her vices and struggles into one, retching outcry of emotion that absolutely floored me. It’s simply a great time that fires on all cylinders all the way through, and may have you tipping your strippers a little extra going forward.

RATING: 4/5

FULL REVIEW

#2. Dune: Part 2

Good God, I can’t remember the last time my expectations were subverted this heavily. I thought the first Dune was good, but nothing making me do backflips in the theater over. But this right here? This had me doing backflips, somersaults and 360 corkscrews when I got done with this. A genuine, unabashedly incredible achievement in sci-fi storytelling. Denis Villeneuve has somehow found a way to amplify every aspect of the previous film to craft a monumental epic that blows the first film out of the water and into another solar system. The ensemble is terrific, with Timothee Chalamet finally selling me on being not just a terrific actor, but a bonafide movie star. Worlds feel fully realized this time around, and the use of color is far more creative and striking, especially with scenes set on the Harkonen home world or even the very first action scene on Arakis. Which reminds me, the action sequences are staggering in how impressively constructed they are, succeeding at imposing the right amount of scale and grandeur into each. I usually hate “chosen one” narratives at this point, and yet the film finds a way to play against the expectations of such a trope, delving into the power and ego that comes with being proclaimed a messiah. Maybe I’m a bit head over heels because I saw it opening weekend in IMAX with a fantastic crowd, but let me tell you, I was leaning forward in my chair multiple times because I was just that locked in. Villeneuve absolutely deserves his flowers for this achievement; one that we all knew he was capable of for a very long time.

RATING: 4.5/5

FULL REVIEW

#1. Challengers

Usually this spot ends up getting taken up by the film that made me say “f*ck yeah, movies!” the most while watching it, and I can think of no better champion of that feeling that I’ve had this year than Luca Guadagnino’s latest masterpiece. My God, what an absolute thrill this film is on both a narrative and technical level. Somehow a love triangle movie with no sex scenes managed to be one of the steamiest, intoxicating films I’ve seen all year, and that really comes down to the performances and the craft behind it. The leading trio is phenomenal, with each possessing different desires and goals that occassionally overlap and often push them apart. The three of them are constantly in bed with one another while also holding knives to each others’ backs, yet none of their conflicts feel forced for the sake of the plot. Most of them are just huge POS’s, but their negatives all come from an understandable place. Their journeys together are told through a frenetic, constantly building visual style that takes sports cinematography to a whole new level, while never forgetting to remind us how erotic the sport of tennis can be. But it’s also a testament to how Guadagnino can elevate simple story beats into moments that feel like life or death. The match between Art and Patrick that we cut to and from throughout the film isn’t in itself a high stakes game, and yet it’s presented as the end of the world because of the emotional implications behind it. Truly some of the most fun and intentful camerawork I’ve seen all year. And the music? Goddamn you Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross for creating this infectious score of electric club-type beats that shouldn’t work as well as they do, oh but they do. This ticks every box I’m looking for in what I consider a perfect movie; it’s enticing, frenetic, and genuinely made me say “oh shit” out loud at one point; not joking. While this was a year of bangers, this one bangs the hardest, and they didn’t even have to put in any banging. Masterful work.

RATING: 5/5

FULL REVIEW